Hey cool, they have online skills tests on Flexijobs FlexJobs.
This is great news for me as I have no job experience to speak of but I am very smart and capable and the tests can help me prove that.
Plus, ya know, I test well. It’s one of my superpowers. So if I can get a whole bunch of very high scores on relevant tests, I will have something to show to potential online employers that will demonstrate that I can do the job.
Because the thing is, I have never doubted my ability to do jobs. I know that I could thrive in an office environment if given the chance.
I’m bright, I’m hardworking, I’m pleasant, and I have a head for pragmatic problem solving in unique and powerful ways.
And I have basic leadership skills that I would love the chance to hone through experience. Right now, all I have is the aptitude.
And aptitude doesn’t mean shit without skills and experience.
Of course, I am looking for online-only work due to my health and mobility issues.That means working from home and that takes self-discipline.
I don’t think that will be a problem. I am going to be far too overjoyed to have actual productive work to do to even think about slacking off.
If anything, I might be too productive. End up finishing all my work way faster than most people can do it and end up bored again.
I mean, I know that I can get a hell of a lot done when I am in “work mode”, like when I did that crazy ass data entry job, and this could be either a problem or an asset.
The ideal job for me would be one where I can go accept a task, complete it, get paid, then immediately go get another task, and another after that, and so on.
I visualize it as this infinite stack of file folders and when I want something to do I just take one off the top of the stack and another immediately pops up like those cafeteria lunch tray dispensers.
I would love that. Give me tasks, missions, orders, objectives, quests, anything really. I just want things to DO and I am not capable of generating those for myself.
I almost never follow my own orders. Like, who am I to tell me what to do?
You don’t learn self-discipline if you have never been disciplined. The only discipline every demanded of me was the impersonal kind which was required to get through school, and well, school was always super easy for me, so not a hell of a lot of “grit” was ever required of me.
This leads me to wonder if I would actually benefit from a mildly BDSM relationship in which a suitably impressive man required/expected a lot from me and I was eager not to disappoint or frustrate him.
Kind of like being in the military but slightly gayer.
Then HE could be the one giving me tasks to complete. I wouldn’t be getting paid for them per se, though ya know… there’s always non-monetary forms of payment.
And it would definitely test my self-discipline. Especially the self-discipline it would take for me to resist telling him to go fuck himself.
But only if I get to watch.
I mean, the logistics alone would be fascinating.
I wouldn’t be signing up for any “punishment” of the kinky variety though. That’s what I mean by “light BDSM”. I would technically have a “master” and I might even consent to being his “servant” if I like him enough, but nobody is EVER going to tie me up unless they want to DIE.
I’m serious. If someone locks me up, ties me up, or otherwise restricts my freedom, my immediate response is to want to kill them for it.
So um, no. That will not be part of our “play”.
Being whipped, spanked, flogged, or caned, however, might be.
More after the break.
Hold on to your wallet!
Because apparently I didn’t.
I can’t find my wallet and it is understandably freaking me the fuck out.
Not only is there around $200 in cash in there, there’s all my ID and stuff, and losing THOSE would be a major expense and a hassle.
I’m positive I had it in my pocket when I went to Wound Care this morning and I am almost positive it was still there on the drive home.
But I am not sure it was in my pocket when I sat down in front of the computer. Maybe it was, maybe it wasn’t. I dunno.
Julian is currently checking the car for it. I have checked all around my computer desk, both on the desk and on the floor, and it ain’t there.
Usually it’s pretty easy to find on my desk. It’s a large-ish black rectangle a couple of inches thick. So it’s hard to miss.
Right now, I would happily accept one of my typical embarrassing “oh, shit, it was right here all along” outcomes.
I will accept the humiliation if it means I get my wallet back.
God, this is stress I don’t need. Life is always finding brand new ways to fuck with me and all I can do is try to roll with the punches as best as I can.
Hopefully Julian will find my wallet and all will be well.
Oh, before I forget, my credit card is also in there, and anyone who has it can use it because there’s no security on it to speak of.
And that’s where there rest of this month’s money resides.
Sigh. As you can imagine, I’m not feeling so secure myself. I wish I was the sort of person who could just shrug something like this off, but I am not.
Julian did not find it in the car, or anywhere on the path from the car to the apartment.
It’s looking like it is gone for good.
Right now, Julian is driving over to Wound Care to see if it’s in the parking lot there.
And tomorrow I will call Wound Care to see if there is anyone there to pick up the phone and if there is, I will ask after my wallet.
But right now, the prognosis is very poor.
Same to you, life. Same to you.
I will talk to you nice people again tomorrow.