I hope you are all enjoying a pleasant and chocolatey Bunny Day. Do not mind me, the sullen diabetic in the corner, eating his no candy and resenting all you happy people who live in Candy Paradise and have absolutely no idea how god damned good you have it.

I mean seriously. Easter is a big “Fuck You!” to diabetics. Christmas has all kinds of other awesome things, like gifts, turkey, an awesome warm togetherness vibe, Christmas trees, and so forth and so on. Halloween, the other candy-oriented holiday, at least has costumes and bobbling for apples and the fun of being scary.

But without candy, all that remains of Easter is a reason to eat ham.

Not that I am bitter or anything.

Anyhow, it is time to clear the unused uncategorized stuff out of my browser once more, and that means it is time for a Bunny Day Special Clearance Sale!

All these wonderful items, and only for the price of one blog entry! Why, with prices like this, we must be insane! As insane as the idea of a egg laying bunny Jesus!

Let’s see here. OK, let’s deal with Frane Selak first.

Meet Mister Lucky

Warning, big ol image ahead. Click to enlarge.

Let us start with the obvious, boring, sensible, and most likely explanation first.

That would be just sheer probability. With billions of people in the world, and instance of someone with this many near death experiences in his life was bound to occur sooner or later.

Or the whole thing could be an urban legend, or just plain fabrication.

That taken care of, the far more entertaining theory is that at some point, Frane Selak made an incredibly powerful and vindictive enemy who has been trying to kill him for decades, but Frane is just too wily and resourceful and quick to respond to die.

I mean, doesn’t the whole thing kind of remind you of Unbreakable? Maybe Frane Selak is actual an ancient immortal being who only poses as a simple music teacher in order to conceal his dark agenda!

But then he got tired of the Big Evil business and decided to just cast a spell so that he would win the lottery and live in style for a while.

Or maybe all the crashes and such were just his way of collecting the souls he needed for that Win The Lottery spell. If so, you would think there would be an easier way.

Isn’t rampant speculation fun?

Print Your House

And speaking of rampant speculation, here is a link to a very interesting bit of it about the future of object printing on a grand scale, written by futurists, who speculate rampantly for a living.

The lucky bastards.

Basically, my take on the article is that the future will see, hopefully, a wholesale, sea change kind of increase in the efficiency of the manufacture of certain things, like houses and highways, and this will create a ripple effect of spreading efficiencies that will in general make the future way better.

I am particularly interested in efficiencies in home building. The burden of a massive mortgage and the barriers this creates towards home ownership are a serious problem in modern society. The ladder of success is increasingly missing many rungs. Anything which makes housing cheaper is a godsend as far as I am concerned.

That said, I am not sure we will be printing entire houses in the future. I am not ruling it out, but I think that it is a far more complicated proposition than the futurists think.

Sure, you can print the parts of a home. But we already do that in places called “factories”, and I am pretty sure the savings in transport costs you get from printing on-site would not begin to compensate for the loss of economies of scale.

“Printing” future highways is actually a more reasonable idea. A highway is far simpler than a house, involving a lot of the same thing with the same basic ingredients following a set pattern. I can imagine a single machine that can do all the tasks with humans only supervising.

Still, the future is looking bright shiny and efficient!

He’s Not Chevy He’s An Asshole

Believe it or not, that is the exact title of a Gawker article about what a complete, total, lifelong, reprehensible, utter asshole douchebag cocksucker of a horrible human being Chevy Chase is.

(For those of you who did not get the reference in the article’s title, relax, neither did I at first, it is really clumsy and terrible. But for what it is worth (not much), it is a reference to the Neil Diamond song “He’s Not Heavy, He’s My Brother”. I know, I know… ouch. Very ouch. )

I was slightly disappointed, but not surprised, that he is has been an asshole to the cast and crew of Community, a show I love, as well. His presence on the cast was the main reason I avoided the show for a long time, and I suppose I had to convince myself he might not be so bad a guy now in order to justify watching the show (which is very good and extremely funny, by the way).

But now I have to face facts : if I want to continue to love the show, I have to overlook the fact that Chevy is still a massive pussy fart of a man and the only difference between him and his character Pierce from the show is that Pierce means well, and Chevy is just mean.

Oh well. The damage is done. I have already watched the first two seasons via Netflix streaming, and I love the show, and I can’t just suddenly un-love it because I know the truth about Chevy now.

Just… nobody tell me anything bad about any of the stars of Better Off Ted, okay?

I don’t tink I could take it right now.

It makes for darkly entertaining reading. I have hated the prick for years and even I did not know even half the shit they dug up.