I sincerely have no idea what to write tonight. So I guess we will be just taking our words for a walk and seeing where the heck we end up this time.

I am just as excited about this as you are.

Today has been dull. But is the good kind of dull that I have come to enjoy on Saturdays. Last night was dinner at Denny’s (oft maligned but we love it) , and tomorrow night we will likely eat out at ABC Country Kitchen (great place for “normal” food and they make a good pot roast so many hearts from me), so today acts as a nice pause between social days. I can relax, regain my social energy (very important for us introverts), and spend a quiet night at home while Joe and Julian go play board games with Joe’s family.

There is definitely something different about having the apartment to myself for an evening. Not that Joe and Julian are loud roomies. We would never get along if they were. All three of us are quiet, bookish types who dislike loud noise, so just by following our own preferences, we keep things quiet for one another as well.

It’s nice how that works out.

But still, as quiet as we all are, we do still make noise, and so having the apartment all to myself for an evening makes for an extra quiet night, with nobody else in my social space at all, and for one night an evening, that is very nice indeed.

I guess that even living with other introverts is not quiet enough for my introverted nature and I truly need time with a completely empty social sphere in order to fully recharge.

That might be part of why I always feel better after being out on my own for a while, like when I take the bus back from an appointment or something. Being out on my own is almost the same as having an empty social sphere, because while I am not alone, there is nobody I know around.

That is how I can be someone with social anxiety who nevertheless does not mind crowds at all. You are anonymous in a crowd. You are not socially interacting with anybody except in a very peripheral sense. So it is kind of the same as being alone.

At least, that is how it is in my reality instance. Your instance will have its own local variables and hence may produce different results.

Wow, after three days of coasting on the news, thinking up things to write seems like so much work now.

It does not help that I am feeling fairly tired. My sleep has been total crap lately. I am actually sort of looking forward to my next crash, because even though they suck big time, I will at least eventually get some decent sleep. Lately all my sleep has been fitful and unsatisfying. It really feels like nothing at all, like I did not really sleep, just… lost time. Just laid there not doing anything while the hands of the clock turned into a blur.

So I have been feeling tense and nervous and restless lately. Restless indeed.

In local news, our big screen television, a gift from Joe’s parents, seems to have finally given up the ghost. You try to turn it on and it tries to warm up the tube like normal, but it just never gets there. The little power on light just blinks three times, then nothing. Over and over again.

It is sad to see.

The sudden death of our big TV has really given me a serious case of the “Don’t Know What You Got Till It’s Gone” blues. Its departure from this mortal realm has really made me aware of just how central to our lives it was.

Every day, I spend hours watching videos via Netflix and playing games on the Wii. When my friends and I get together, we spend the whole time watching DVDs and VHS tapes. Joe, Julian and I spend four weekend mornings per week watching the Daily Show and Colbert together, plus stuff from the DVD collection like X-files and Sanctuary. All of it is done via that lovely big TV.

And I highly doubt that we can afford to buy one on our own. We only got the one we had because Joe’s parents bought a newer, bigger, better TV and gave us their old one.

I somehow doubt they will be doing that again any time soon.

So now we are stuck watching TV on a tiny tabletop TV, the sort of thing you would stick on a dresser in your bedroom. Not quite appropriate for living room use, but it beats the hell out of having no television at all.

So if this truly is your last hurrah, Big TV, if your tube truly is dead and therefore it would cost more to fix you then to buy a new one, then rest in peace knowing you gave us many many house of lovely big picture enjoyment.

No wonder it wore out. We used that thing all the damned time!

Watching TV on the little one is… an adjustment, but the mind compensates fairly rapidly. it is not like I am squinting and wondering what is going on now.

There is just a lot less detail.

Playing games on the Wii is slightly more of an adjustment. I am still enjoying the hell out of playing Spider-Man : Shattered Dimensions for the Wii. It is such an awesome game that I am covered in sweat with a racing heart when I am done playing. It is literally pulse pounding excitement for me.

In fact, I would be enjoying it even if it did not star my number one guy, Spider-man. But getting to me him, web-slinging around and laying the smack down on bad guys and tossing out hilarious one-liners, makes it a nearly transcendent experience for me.

Too bad I have to play it on a (relatively) tiny screen now.

Seeya tomorrow, folks!