The truth is highly overrated.

Or as my favorite rapper ever put it :

<iframe width=”560″ height=”315″ src=”https://www.youtube.com/embed/8vgDpI8kU98″ frameborder=”0″ allowfullscreen></iframe>

I just got back from therapy, and one of the things we discussed was my decision that a hardcore, total dedication to the literally, objectively true was self-destructive and that the human mind needs the capacity to “spin” information in a way that preserves the ego while maintaining sufficient relationship to the truth.

As expected, he struggled a little with the concept. It’s a slippery one. It comes very close to saying I have decided to believe lies, and that’s simply impossible.

The human mind cannot choose to believe that which it believes to be untrue. That’s a null set, an empty equation. a logical non-starter.

However, there is always more than one way to look at things, and that is wherein the wiggle room lies. What I have been doing is looking at things with a certain sort of objective truth being the sole criterion for validity.

That approach allows no room for mercy, forgiveness, or adjustment for ego protection. And that leaves the mind far too vulnerable and fragile.

Worse, that kind of brutal truth machine thinking is far too easily hijacked by the bad agents of my mind and used as evidence against me by my malicious inner prosecutor.

Thus, the “truth” is turned against me.

I used to be so proud of being “naked before the truth”, meaning that I did not try to protect myself from the truths of life, no matter how harsh or dark or damning.

But now,. I wonder what is so wrong about putting a fucking coat on.

Furthermore, the sort of “truth” derived from my brutal truth machine is only one sort of truth, and only true if things like the wider emotional picture and a robust view of people’s needs are ignored.

So it might be true, but it is far from the whole truth.

And what has my merciless,. pitiless,. fanatic pursuit of the truth ever gotten me anyway? Sure, I get a lot of insights from it, but those insights haven’t exactly improved my lot in life. It certainly hasn’t made me any happier.

So big deal. What use is seeing more clearly than others if it doesn’t make things better in your life?

Repeat after me : I’d rather be happy than right.
I’d rather be happy than right.
I’d rather be happy than right. .

That’s the lesson I need to pound into my head. There’s such a thing as a functional delusion – a belief that is not objectively true but nevertheless is a net gain for the person who believes it.

I think a lot of people’s higher-level beliefs are like that. Beliefs about how the world works, politics, transpersonal morality, and so forth. Their primary function is a psychological one, and as long as that belief does not impede or impair their ability to function on a day to day basis, it really doesn’t matter how “true” it is.

People believe what they need to believe.

And there’s nothing wrong with that.

I have pursued the kind of truth I pursued driven by a blind faith that, when all is said and done, I am always better off knowing the truth.

But now I am questioning that faith. Surely it doesn’t have to be so final or unforgiving. Surely I am better off leaving room for certain adjustments.

Surely there is room in their for compassion and mercy towards oneself.

No wonder I have felt like I was forever walking over frozen tundra with the icy wind whipping through me. Via this fanatic pursuit of transpersonal truth,  I have denied myself all forms of shelter and protection from the elements. Not to mention cutting myself off from the warming rays of mercy and kindness.

Now I am asking myself : is believing something that isn’t one hundred percent true really that big a deal? Is adjusting belief to support my ego really such a crime? Is a little fudging of the facts really all that dangerous?

The answer may surprise you.

Suddenly, I see why some people mistrust anything that seems too coldly rational and brutally objective. On a very basic level, the “truth” can’t be trusted.It might hurt you at any second. It has no mercy or restraint. It doesn’t take anyone’s feelings into account.

It just nails down reality and takes away people’s ability to deny what they cannot handle or do not need to know.

That was, in a way, what I liked about it. The truth, however bitter, was something you could rely on because it did not change no matter how people felt about it. What it lacked in compassion it gained in solidity.

The truth had weight in a world that often felt paper thin to me due to my transcendental mindset that seeks inner truths at the expense of the outer realities of life.

But now, I think I took it too far. To the point of brutalizing myself unnecessarily. Like I said, my inner prosecutor used this powerful truth seeking mind of mine as a source of ammunition against me, and a chance to paint everything in the wosrt possible light.

So what I really need is a defense attorney. The prosecution has had the court to themselves for far too long. I need a sympathetic person willing to fight the prosecutor and hold him accountable for his lies and tricks and dishonesty.

And I am getting there. I have tapped into my vast rage reserves and hooked them up to my defense. The result is that when I catch the negative thoughts, I don’t just stop them and insert a more positive one.

I blast that negative thought so hard it shatters into a million pieces on impact with the wall and the pieces burst into flames.

Get the fuck OUT OF MY MIND,  you disease! If I could, I would scrape you out of my brain with a grapefruit spoon!

But I suppose I will give this therapy thing a chance first.

I will talk to you nice people again tomorrow.