Welcome back to the wonderful world of scientific progress, the advancement of the cause of humanity, and really bitchin’ gizmos.

Speaking of which, we have this particularly squirmy gadget that might well revolutionize digestive medicine forever : a self-propelling endoscopic probe that can ‘swim’ your entire digestive tract in just a couple of hours, taking detailed picture all the way.

It does this by squirming like a tadpole, which I imagine many of you are also doing while imagining a little robot squirming its way through your intestines. But it’s less than half an inch in diameter, and a couple of inches long, so it’s not like you would really feel it. And it can go in either end, depending on what the doctor wants to see.

And if doing the entire intestinal tract in just two hours doesn’t sound like an impressive rate of speed, remember that we have forty feet of small intestine alone. So in reality, a two inch object covering that distance in just two hours without so much as bruising a single villi is pretty darn impressive.

And speaking as someone who has had an older style of endoscopic examination of my digestive system (actually two, one from one end and one from the other, and trust me, the other is WAY easier), I am all for anything that makes that smoother and easier on the patient.

Not exactly a painful experience, but speaking for the top-down one, I sincerely hope I never have to swallow a camera the size of a baby’s fist attached to a cord that looks like something a heavy metal band would use to hook up their amps again. It’s profoundly fucked up.

Well, so much for other news. What’s up in the world of self-driving cars?

(I swear, I didn’t plan this, it’s just that two more cool stories on this subject came up lately. )

First up, the state of Nevada, always an innovator, has become the first state to officially legalize the self-driving car.

This means that the first legal hurdle facing the dawn of the self-driving vehicle has been leapt. The technology is advancing with extraordinary rapidity, and the need for a jurisdiction where one can legally test vehicles on public roads will be coming faster than we would ever have thought just a few years ago.

Of course, there’s still a lot of ground to cover before then. Actually integrating self-driving cars into traditional traffic will be the final step in the process, and the most risky, not to mention the most controversial. I am curious as to whether it will be highway driving or city driving first. Highway driving is simpler on some levels, but more dense. City traffic is less dense but more unpredictable. We shall see.

But having a state where you can build up to that point without legal barriers is going to help a lot.

All hail the coming electric self-driving car future! Imagine the individual autonomy that will allow.

The other cool bit of self-driving car news is from those hard working Germans at Volkswagen, who have announced their development of a ‘temporary autopilot’ system for their cars.

Now relax, it’s not as cool as that sounds. But it’s close!

It’s a logical extension of the modern trend in “smart driving” cars that avoid collisions, make parking easier, and so on. While this system is active during highway driving, it monitors your lane to keep you in it, maintains a safe distance from the car ahead of you, and even automatically slows you down when going into a bend in the road.

How cool is that? Already, the car is a better driver than half the people on the road. I am wondering if this system could actually improve your mileage.

Of course, you as the driver can take over at any moment. Helping people avoid accidents is one thing, but asking them to totally trust the car is another.

To me, this is like the ultimate form of cruise control. It’s not really autopilot exactly, because it’s not like you would be safe completely letting your mind wander or anything (for one thing, you would miss your exit), but it could still reduce the stress and strain of driving considerably.

And of course, the more systems like this on the road, the safer driving will be. I am hoping that I will live long enough to see a future where they look back at how casually we accept the high death toll that accompanies our love (and need) of the automobile, and shudder at such callous barbarity.

After all, we all know you are a safe and responsible driver, but what about all those other maniacs and morons out there?