..is better than none.

This is about the revolutionary idea that anything worth doing is worth doing badly.

It’s been almost a year since I first read those words and they are still sinking in. The idea behind them is that if it is worth doing, you are better off doing it badly than you are not doing it at all.

It sounds so simple but it’s so huge.

The new wrinkle for me is applying it to my writing. I was watching one of those Reddit thread videos I love so much this morning and in it, someone mentions that they had started their career as a writer by winning a few writing contests, and suddenly it hit me that if what it takes to get me to submit my work to the outer world is to give myself permission to do a really sloppy and half-assed job, I should go for it.

Specifically, I was imagining reading about a writing contest and banging out an entry all in one sitting. This would get around my issue with not wanting to go back to something once I have stopped writing it as well as making an end run around feelings that my writing is not good enough or that I can’t sustain the effort needed to write something and then keep working on it till it is good enough.

Fuck all that noise. Maybe I am just not the sort of writer who rewrites. Maybe the bestI can do, at least for now, is fire off a first draft and submit it.

Hell, like I’ve said before, I have been submitting first drafts and getting away with it – in fact, getting great marks that way – for my whole life.

Maybe I am some kind of mutant breed of writer who is built for short bursts of concentrated effort that produce great results instead of being built for the marathon effort of making something as good as I can.

Who knows, maybe once I get into the habit of submitting to contests and publications in this half-assed way, I will find my ambition and that will inspire me to spend more time getting things as good as I can get them.

The point is that whatever it takes to get me to start sending my words out into the world where they might do me some good, I should do it, and maybe escape my current life just like the person from the Reddit video did.

This is huge for me. It destroys a shitload of the excuses I have been subconsciously hiding behind. That’s why I felt it necessary to write it into this blog before it could disappear back into the chaos of my mind.

Sending my precious words out into the cold dark world is still a huge step to take, but this recent epiphany has made it a whole lot smaller.

Who knows, I might write my way out of this stupid life of mine yet.

Or at least do something truly productive for once.

More after the break.

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Still haven’t made up my mind about (ick) Dragon’s Dogma.

Basically, I’ve been ignoring the question. I am having a lot of fun with my second playthrough of Divinity : Original Sin 2 and that keeps me busy enough that I don’t technically “have” to decide on Dragon’s Dogma at the moment.

But it’s there in the back of my mind and I really should resolve it one way or another. Either return the damned thing or commit to playing it long enough to get a better idea of whether I like it or not despite that meaning I can’t return it.

Returning it would be the easiest thing to do. I can’t say I have enjoyed it thus far. The best thing about it so far is its stunningly real feeling world, and that’s a pretty strong plus, but the horrible dialogue is a pretty strong minus.

The only thing keeping me from returning it is the nagging feeling that I will be missing out on something amazing by not giving it a proper chance.

Then again, it’s had almost two hours to convince me of its worth. That ls a fairly proper chance. And a properly fair chance.

A huge part of the buzz for the game is its supposedly “perfect” combat system. Problem is that I have barely had any chance to fight in the game yet, and those fights I did do were so chaotic that all I basically did was mash buttons in the right general direction and pray.

That’s a far cry from “perfect”. But that might be because I am old and my reflexes are slow and I don’t do so well in realtime combat in an unfamiliar system any more.

Maybe if I continue to play, I will adapt to it. Maybe not.

I guess I will just continue to mull it over. Ignore the voice in my head that is berating me for agonizing over such a trivial decision and insists I “should” have decided by now.

Fuck you, voice. There’s no hurry. I still have time before my window of opportunity to return it closes. I have good games to play in the meantime.

And who knows, maybe something I know I want will go on sale soon and I will return DD in order to buy it.

In other words, if I wait long enough, the decision might make itself! Or at least become a lot easier.

Relatedly (kinda), I figured out why I am doing so much better in DOS2 this time : I chose an easier difficulty level.

That wasn’t obvious because the difficulty levels don’t have numbers or any other ways to compare the difficulties, just vague descriptions.

The one I am on now is described as “fair but forgiving”. Which sounds like something I would want from a lover more than a game, but whatever.

If I want a challenge, I can always turn the difficulty up.

But right now, I am having too much fun to care.

I will talk to you nice people again tomorrow.