Just had a highly illuminating and depressing conversation with my diabetic dietician (yay, I finally have one) and she ended up (accidentally) revealing to me just how many carbs I am still eating.
No wonder I rock a blood sugar between 20 and 30. Between the carbs and my total lack of physical activity, I’m in a diabetic deathtrap.
I can’t say I was entirely surprised. For the last couple of weeks, I have been feeling iffy about my diet and the many ways carbs still make it in. The dried fruit in my trail mix, the fries I still eat with my McD’s, the fruit I eat, the sugar-free desserts I have been having with every meal….
My defenses are porous as fuck.
Time to buckle down and truly take this shit seriously, then. I really don’t want to have to do it but I have to do it.
Moira, my dietician, is going to email me a carb chart and I will use that to plan my meals. I might have to change my diet a fair bit.
Cut down on the sugar free desserts for sure. They may not have sugar but they still have carbs. So instead of having them with every meal, I might switch to just having them with supper and my midnight snack.
And (big sigh) start getting salads with my McD’s instead of fries.
Honestly, it’s not really that big a deal. I seem to naturally be shifting towards a more ectomorphic view that things like fries are just empty carbs and not real food anyhow. I find I get a lot more excited over veggies and protein lately.
Oh, and I will have to stop pretending that carbs I get from ordering in somehow don’t count. Nope. Gonna have to treat those like any other meal.
Moira (damn I love that name) says that I should be getting 45-60 grams of carbs per meal. That seems doable.
Funny story : At first, she was just saying 45 grams, and I was like… “Per day???”.
Phew, no. She doesn’t believe in low carb diets like that. Says they are unscientific.
On that, we agree.
Now that I am thinking it over, the changes need not be super radical. I think I can make my diet fit into that many carbs with the reforms listed above.
And what the hell, it will give me something to do. Something to focus on and accomplish instead of just rotting away in the sweet toxic park that is the world of my fucking video games.
I’m getting sick of them, to be honest. There has to be more fulfilling and interesting things to do with my time.
The karaoke is a good start. I mean, my voice varies from barely passable to actively nauseating, but that doesn’t matter because I am singing for fun and exercise.
I love singing, it makes me happy, and it helps with my sleep apnea.
It’s all win, really.
Eventually, I will find my webcam and launch my career as a YouTuber.
I know I ca do it at least as well as the people I have been watching. And there is a decent chance I can do it a hell of a lot better.
In fact, it’s possible that I could be absolutely goddamned amazing at it. Better than all the rest. A rock star from the word go.
But first, I have to stop being such a pussy, find the cam, and get started.
Aaaaaany minute now.
Gee, thank goodness I am young and healthy and have my whole life ahead of me.
O wait…. nvm.
More after the break.
Hey, no problem!
Both as Cliff Huxtable and himself, Bill Cosby had a son of whom he said “He has a two word philosophy of life : no problem.”
That’s because Theo Huxtable is a Sagittarius and they have a very laid back attitude toward life. I know this intimately because I have my Moon in Sagittarius and so that is kind of my life philosophy too.
Only kind of, though. My Sun sign is still Taurus. We tend to assume there’s a problem until we are satisfied there isn’t.
We’re not a trusting lot.
The thing is, I am not sure why I have this “no problem” attitude, or what it means. So I figured that tonight, I will poke around in this capacious cranium of mind and take a stab at figuring it out.
It’s partly about taking pride in one’s adaptability. Of that I am sure. We centaurs have agile, acrobatic minds that can apply themselves to a lot of situations and we love showing them off by being the person who solves the problem that people are upset about and making everything a-OK again.
We love that shit.
But it also encompasses a particular reaction to stress. The initial Sag response to tress is to relax, which might seem crazy if not the exact opposite of what you should do.
But actually, by relaxing, the Sag keeps their mind in the exact state of relaxed alertness that performance psychiatrists agree leads to top performance.
So by having the opposite reaction, the Sag instinctively gets peak performance while not even seeming like they are trying.
This is extremely irritating to others. Luckily, we don’t care.
Of course, that only gets you so far. Many things in life require you to slow down and focus so you can drive single mindedly towards a goal with a long term sustained effort.
Sometimes life is a marathon, not a sprint.
You can’t get far on just inspiration and cleverness. Eventually you have to do the unfun things you’ve been using your mental agility to dodge.
Where was I? Oh right. Another aspect of being Sag is living in a world full of people who worry too much and about the wrong things.
Or so it seems to you. From a Sag point of view, people are always getting caught up in problems to which you see a clear and obvious solution and causing them a lot of unnecessary stress and worry.
If you’re a sage Sag, you learn that most people don’t see the world like you do and so you do not judge them for their quagmires.
They still make you sad, though, and so you try to help. You kindly offer said people the brilliant solution that was so obvious to you and bask in their praise of your heroic smartness and general aura of sagacity.
Just kidding. The solution is so obvious and brilliant that when you offer it, the person feels stupid for not having thought of it themselves and gets mad at you for it.
Trust me on that one.
Well I guess that’s at least part of the structure of the Sagittarius “no problem” attitude.
It can make school easy…. and growing up very hard.
Some shit you just should not dodge.
I will talk to you nice people again tomorrow.