Or, the Messiah’s Burden
I made it to Denny’s last night, possibly unwisely. At least I didn’t feel very wise when I was sitting there trying to participate in the conversation while being racked by chills.
God, do I hate chills.
And after I got back and had finished the day’s blogging, I found my head teeming with political speech. It was like I was delivering a free-flowing, rambling interview slash speech aimed at a revolving cast of worthy adversaries in my head.
Not that unusual for me as far as that goes. But the points I was making were devastating. Stuff I didn’t even know I had in me , or at least, not in that form. The sort of political speech that could destroy generations of rotted and unworthy bullshit and give politics the enema it so desperately need.
The type of speech that can change the world, and usher in a new era of mass enlightenment as the scales fall from people’s eyes and they finally realize that we are all on a hot train to hell right now and it’s entirely within our power to stop it.
Billions of us. Dozens of them. They don’t stand a chance.
It’s simple. Emitting greenhouses gases will be illegal, on both a personal and international level, for everyone on the planet.
And on the international level, “illegal” will mean “grounds for invasion by the UN”. A very limited invasion – no occupation, no regime change, no new treaties – just the immediate and total destruction of that country’s capacity to add to global warming.
If that makes the people want to rise up and overthrow the government that got them into that hot mess, that’s up to them.
It’s either that, or resign ourselves to humanity’s epitaph being, “to be fair, it was this or make a couple hundred billionaires sad”.
Now a lot of people aren’t going to like what I have to saying because if you can overthrow the elite and save humanity and the lives of everyone you know and love not to mention civilization, well you kind of have to, don’t you?
And we don’t want to have to rouse ourselves from our consumerist coma long enough to do something as lame and unfun as saving us from having to consume the flesh of our weaker children as the global economy collapses when the food dies.
And the food is definitely going to die. Not all of it, but most of it, and there will be nowhere near enough left to feed a billion people let alone 8 billion.
So maybe that epitaph should read, “to be fair, it was this or have to make some kind of of personal sacrifice, and that was clearly impossible”.
I am sure the ghosts of our children will see that we made the right choice there.
But here’s the thing : this devolves all the way back down to the personal level for me, because if I can see all these things coming and knowing that I have the ability to create powerful warnings that would spread all over the world and possibly actually spark the revolution that will save humanity…. well, I kind of should, shouldn’t I?
And I’m scared.
More after the break.
The birth of a giant
Well at least I’m too old to die young.
I am scared by the enormity of it all. This mission or message or whatever of mine could be so much bigger than my sad little soul.
And if it had any measure of success, it would be a very large commitment of time, energy, and wherewithal. Possibly a lifelong one. It could pull me out of my cozy cocoon and thrust me into the glaring spotlight of the world in a way you can’t come back from.
And I mean, who am I to take on trying to save the world? I’m just some guy. Yet another fat nerd on the Internet. A nobody.
Yeah bullshit. I’ve never believed that.
I’ve know I was special since the day I learned to read at the age of 3. I have lugged this giant brain of mine around for all fifty of my years and I have done so like Gulliver among the Lilliputians, always making sure not to step on the pygmies all around me.
I’ve alwaysI known that I had power beyond what most people could reach due to my intellectual gifts, as well as my powers of personality.
I stand out in any crowd because my brilliance makes me shine like a lighthouse on a hill. And the older I get, the brighter I glow.
And the power grows.
That’s what it really boils down to. There is an enormous power differential between me and most of humanity, and I think that has given me an enormous sense of responsibility that I have been unconsciously dodging for my whole life.
Not proud of that, but it is what it is.
And I have been feeling that responsibility quite acutely ever since my brain spontaneously switched into political oratory mode last night.
I am hearing the call of destiny, and like many who were called to greatness before me, I do not want to go.
Well, part of me doesn’t, anyhow.
It’s a clash between the personal and the transpersonal. One I feel like I have been preparing for all my life, in a way.
Once I embrace my destiny, there is no going back. The personal is permanently supplanted by the transpersonal, and that’s a hell of a lot to ask of a guy.
But I don’t really have a choice. The egg I have unknowingly carrying around for my entire life is starting to hatch, so like it or not,
And whatever I am now will be utterly destroyed in the hatching and whatever that beastie inside me might be, that’ll be me.
I guess I can learn to live with that.
I will talk to you nice people again tomorrow.