So this problem was on my mind today, so I talked about it.
Having the game you’ve been very much enjoying playing start crashing consistently is really hard on the nerves.
Having it happen even after you turn the graphics settings down to their absolute minimum is just plain depressing.
I have a couple more ideas, but like I say in the vid, I may have to face the fact that I just can’t play Rogue Trader until I get a better power supply unit, or PSU.
Which would be a serious bummer, man
Because I really am enjoying the game quite a bit. The highly unique setting took some getting used to, but it’s basically science fiction with some magic involved in the mechanics of things, so it wasn’t too big of a stretch.
And the game has a very strong and unique art style, which honestly gets to be a bit much at times.
But such trivia aside, it’s a great game and I am very invested in the plot and the battle system and so on. .
So having to stop playing now would seriously suck.
But my nerves can’t take making progress five minutes at a time. Especially now that I have started a big battle with what appears to be some asshole in elaborate power armor doing the usual, “You thought I was dead, but now it is you who will die!” thing.
I could have a lot of fun with a character who’s an old, jaded, tired superhero.
“Look, let me save us both some trouble. You want to destroy the world as revenge against all the people who never took you seriously and now you want to make them pay. That sound about right?”
“Um… yeah. Look, I have this whole speech prepared. Can I deliver it anyway?
“Sure… knock yourself out. ”
I totally imagine him as being played or voiced by Bruce Campbell.
Anyhow, it would be one thing if the crashes just left me on my desktop. That would be aggravating AF but I could tolerate it.
But no, I have to do an ice cold reboot every time.
I used to only have to do a lukewarm reboot, where all I had to do was press the reset button atop my computer case.
But now when I do that, the computer reboots but the internet is fucked. So now I have to actually turn the power off at the power supply, wait a few seconds, then hit the power button to boot up again.
At least that works, knock on wood. I would be absolutely lost without the internet.
Well, I’d be shopping for a new computer, if that’s what it took.
If I can’t play Rogue Trader for a while, I will have to find something new to me but old enough not the make the computer access the GPU at all.
That’s getting increasingly difficult. My taste in video games keep shrinking over time and at the same time I have played most of the games in my genre of choice, RPGs.
Or as they are apparently calling them now, CRPGs, which stands for, believe it or not, frigging COMPUTER RPGs.
As opposed to what, ones inscribed on papyrus? It’s a genre of video games. That pretty much guarantees that a computer is involved on some level.
What they mean by that, I surmise, is that it’s a computer STYLE RPG, like the turn based epics I enjoy, as oppose to an ARPG, which stands for Action RPG, where you are physically present in the game world and have to fight in realtime, like in games like the Zelda series or Skyrim or Kingdoms of Amalur.
I like those too, though slightly less as I get older.
Anyhow, I’ve played most of the top CRPGs of the past now, so I really have to scrounge around to find something I want to play.
I don’t want to go back to playing Tyranny. That game’s depressing.
There’s got to be something I have played yet. Or would play again.
More after the break.
The Unemployed Man
I probably should wait and do a video on this instead but what the hell, my muse is very powerful but it is not patient.
Warn the affiliates we may be going late.
To be an unemployed man is to feel worthless. Society judges a man by what he earns and/or produces and if you’re an unemployed man you make absolutely nothing.
Now raise that to the power of being not just unemployed but unemployable because you are handicapped. That means you do not have the hope of ever attaining any worth. You are nothing but a drain on society and that’s all you will ever be.
And that creates a dark and terrible shame within you that no amount of reassurance from loved ones or society can dislodge.
I speak from experience.
Patient readers know that I have a massive sense of shame about having been so unproductive for my entire life. It’s gotten a little better over time but it is still a thick, dark cloud in whose shadow I shiver and freeze.
Story of my life, really. Feeling shame for things I can do nothing about.
And there is no way out of that mess except to find work somehow. And the elephantine weight of the shame I carry does not make that easy. Most of the time I don’t feel like I am capable of doing much at all besides the same ol’ unsatisfactory bullshit.
Just spinning my wheels and waiting to die.
That deadly shame is the real monster in my head that chases me everywhere I go and forces me to hide like a mob informant for fear of being found out.
God, how badly I want to stop fearing the dreadful moment when someone asks me what I do for a living.
Nothing. I do nothing. I do nothing, I make nothing, I add nothing, and I’m worth nothing.
On all levels I am nothing but a liability.
And knowing that’s not true does not keep me from feeling that way.
I need a deprogrammer.
I will talk to you nice people again tomorrow.