Working in being, in general, pleased with myself.
This is big news. Generally, I either hate myself or try not to think about it. But I think I have been making real progress in dealing with my bullshit lately and I think I am ready to take a few steps in the direction of liking myself a fair bit.
After all, I’m a delightful fellow. I’m warm and intelligent and funny. People like being around me. I am a highly unique individual. I have never met anyone else quite like me. I shine with my own special kind of energy and love sharing that shine with others.
So what if I am not a traditionally productive citizen? I pay my way my own way. And oddly enough, I am sure I will find some way to earn some pay some day. Until then, I will keep on expressing myself in ways both old and new, and every day will bring a little bit of sunshine and a little bit of rain, and I will make it through okay no matter what.
Because there’s sunshine in my heart. It’s always there.
Right now, I can’t find my deodorant and I can’t find my Wellbutrin.
My current theory is that they ran off together after a torrid affair.
My guess is they were ashamed of the illicit nature of their forbidden romance, and feared I would not approve.
They only had to ask. I’m famously tolerant.
Inanimate objects these days. Sheesh.
I’ve been craving a Space Empire type game. The sort of thing where I can explore and colonize a big galaxy and build up my galactic civilization and that kind of thing.
So I bought this game Endless Space 2 on Steam. It had great reviews and it seemed like exactly the sort of thing I was looking for. And it was $12. So what the heck.
Did NOT make the learning curve. Too much to absorb too fast and that was the beginner’s tutorial. So I returned it.
Then I am talking to my friend Windchaser this morning and she recommends this game Galactic Civlilizations 2.
So I look it up on Steam and discover I already own it. It’s right there in my Library.
Must have gotten in from some bundle or another and forgotten it.
I get the feeling this is going to happen a lot in the future. I have over 100 games in my Steam Library now. I am bound to forget some now and then.
So I download and install it and try to make it through the tutorial but nope.
I think the problem is that I am craving a kind of game that I am not currently in the mood to learn to play.
That’s when I realized that what I really wanted was something like the old Master of Orion series. And following that thought, I googled Master of Orion.
Turned out, there is a fairly recent entry in the series.
The kicker? It’s made by the same people who made Endless Space 2.
Think I will just content myself with zapping Mutants in FO3 for now.
Man blasting Super Mutants is fun.
Not that I’m racist or anything. All of them attacked me first. I’ve known some very nice super mutants who were well spoken and articulate and one of them even had a super sexy Michael Dorn voice.
Still not as sexy as my main crush Doc Mitchell though.
Those are both from Fallout New Vegas, though. I don’t think I have a crush in Fallout 3 yet. I’m spending too much time with things that want to kill me so I zap them with the alien laser gun I got from the UFO DLC I talked about before.
Speaking of which, I did another of the DLC quests earlier today. In this one, you travel to this remote outpost to…. play a VR simulation mission.
You read that right. In the video game, you play a video game.
How very meta.
It was actually rather fun, because it allowed the player (me) to play a somewhat different kind of game for a little while. One that is less serious and less realistic, with flashing powerups and less inventory and a more Xbox kind of feel.
That said, I was glad when I finally got back to reality…. well, the game’s version of it.
I’d really missed looting.
In the game’s reality, the only reason you are doing the VR thing is that it’s the only way to open up the armory of this secret base (plausible).
And of course, they had to thrown in the whole “if you die in VR, you die in real life!” thing in order to keep the stakes consistent (so VERY plausible).
Then when you finally complete the VR thing and get access to all the sweet gear in the armory (MEGA LOOTING), suddenly out of nowhere a bunch of the guys you were working with attack.
And I was all WTF but I kicked their asses with my alien laser phaser gun anyhow, and got me some VERY sweet power armor in the process.
Only later did I remember that they had set up that there was a rebel faction amongst the people I was working with, the Outcasts.
Yup. Rebel Outcasts.
These rebels had wisely waited until the armory was opened to launch their coup d’etat. So I launched my own coup d’etat by blasting their fucking heads off.
Then I got the fuck away from those people because even the good guy ones kept calling me “savage” or “outsider” or “wastelander” and being super prejudiced about the whole damn thing.
Well fuck YOU, this “savage” just saved your ass and made you all look like a bunch of pussies. So much for your tightassed military discipline and training.
Most recently, I saved a bunch of good guy mercs who were trapped on the roof of a hotel by Super Mutants.
Is it any wonder that I prefer the reality where I am a kickass hero?
I will talk to you nice people again tomorrow.