Friday Science Tintinabulation, May 24, 2013

Another week has flown past like a flock of tiny birds in a heck of a hurry, and that means it is time once again for our weekly dose of the Friday Science Whatever.

It was rough, picking just six to do, but I did it, and here they are.

First up : you know that old trope, seen mostly in cartoons, about elephants being afraid of mice?

Well of course, that is absolute rubbish. Not a word of truth to it. Pure fantasy.

It’s bees that scare them.

Research has shown that elephants are hella scared of bees, so much so that they have developed a very specific “OMG BEES” noise they make when they want to warn the rest of the herd that they are on Bee Alert Status for the foreseeable future.

This discovery has lead to speculation that bees might be the solution to the frequent conflicts between elephants and humans that happen in places like Kenya, where farmers sometimes kill elephants for trying to eat their crops, and elephants in turn sometimes rampage and kill people.

The idea would be to deploy enough beehives around your farm to keep the elephants way, which really sounds like the punchline to a joke to me.

Next up : News about printing your food!

The news is that NASA is looking into the idea as a way to provide astronauts with a compact, light, and multifaceted food supply while on long space voyages.

The idea is that the basic “building blocks” of food would be stored as powders in canisters like the various colored inks in an inkjet picture, and when you wanted something, you would just tell the printer to print it, which it would do just like any 3D printing process, a layer at a time.

I have my doubts. For one, I would be real real curious to know what those “building blocks of food” are. The idea that you could get meaningful variety in foodstuffs out of a limited number of powders seems inherently flawed to me.

Our food is made of highly complex organic chemicals that take more than that to “replicate”.

Next up, an extraordinary finding from the world of human optics : scientists have found a woman who can see 99 million more colors than the result of us.

The typical human eye contains three kinds of cone cells, and that gives us the ability to see around a million different colors.

But this one has four types of cones in her eyes, giving her a whopping 100 million colors. Compared to her, we are all colorblind.

For decades, people have theorized that people like this, called tetrachromats (you and I are trichromats), might exist. But this is the first time one has been found and verified.

The obvious question for us thoughtful types is : what on Earth does this woman see? The world must look radically different to her than it does to us. And yet, nobody can imagine a color they have never seen. So we will never know.

Now we get into the really good future-y stuff! Like how about this : scientists have found a way to get human skin cells to revert into embryonic stem cells.

If this can be developed and applied on a wide scale, it might just be the breakthrough that throws open the gates for the regenerative medicine future we all hope to live long enough to enjoy.

With enough pluripotent stem cells, in theory, we could patch up absolutely any damage to the human body by removing the damage tissue and flooding the void with stem cells, which will then turn into whatever kind of cell is needed to fix the damage.

Spinal cord injuries, brain injuries, organ failures, you name it. We could ifx literally everything. Not to mention the role stem cells can play in the future of tissue engineering.

These are exiting times!

Next up, let’s talk clean hydrogen.

If you are like me, you are saying “WTF is that? How do you get hydrogen dirty? Hydrogen is so clean it doesn’t even have protons!”

What is meant by the term is hydrogen that is produced by clean methods. Traditional ways to get hydrogen are messy, expensive, and have a big carbon footprint.

But a new method might change all that and give us a practical way to make all the clean, cheap hydrogen we need for a hydrogen future.

I am still not sold on a hydrogen future, mind you. I can’t see adding hydrogen to the equation as being a practical solution when we are doing modestly well with just plain old electricity. Electric cars grow more efficient every day, and do not require a massive infrastructure investment either.

But still, this is the sort of development that might, some day, change my mind.

Finally, the most mindblowing scientific newsbit of the week : this invention.

Yeah, sorry, it’s a video, not a news story.

If his machine can do what he says, that is nothing short of earthshaking. If you can turn plastic back into the oil from whence it came, then suddenly all plastics are not just recyclable but infinitely recyclable, and the future could be powered not by hydrogen or electricity but plastic.

What I would really like to see is his invention scaled up to refinery size and set up next to a landfill, where you offer to buy plastic from whoever brings it to you.

Pay them half of what you will get for the crude-ish oil you will produce (or even better, filter on sight and sell gasoline) and you will get a lot of people recycling a hell of a lot of plastic.

Of course, in terms of global warming, the ideal thing would be if it was simply turned right back into plastic. In that sense, the oil produced would be like the stem cells of the process, ready to be turned into whatever else we need.

That is such a huge jump in efficiency, it gives me goosebumps.

That’s all for this week, folks!

The usual Thursday breakdown

All diary today. Well, OK… one link.

You would think that seeing a grown man (with stubble!) act like a 2 year old girl would be creepy. But somehow, it just makes it all the more adorable.

I admit, that is probably not everyone’s reaction. Damn, I need a boyfriend.

Anyhow, I thought it was a brilliant idea for a fairly unique brand of comedy. It gives us insight into the strange and magical world of the two year old, too.

At that age, we are still more animal than human, and yet we are taking our first steps towards becoming human, and that is fascinating.

She seems fairly advanced for 2 years old, actually. She uses language like a three year old. Full original sentences in the proper context, and all that.

But anyhow, enough about her. What about me? (Imagine that said by James from Pokemon).

I had a fairly productive therapy day. I unpacked a lot of the thoughts I have been sharing with you folks about being more positive, seeing turning 40 as the end of the previous chapter and the beginning of one that is fresh and new, and hunting down and ejecting those nasty negative thoughts.

I am coming dangerously close, in fact, to positive self-esteem.

And that is sort of scary. You would think it would be something someone would eagerly embrace as their salvation, but I have hated myself for a long damned time and liking myself would mean a lot of changes.

In fact, I seriously suspect it might lead to… you know… doing things. Eek!

Not that I want to stay forever in this sad little world of mine where I do very little that is productive and I spend all day fucking around playing Facebook games and the highlight of my day is when I eat.

In fact, in good news (trust me, this is good), I felt my anger and impatience at spending my days like this rising this afternoon. In fact, I came very close to some kind of emotional crisis.

That’s a good thing. You have to let go of the old before you can embrace the new sometimes, and I know that in order to make room for a more productive and fulfilling life, I am going to have to make a break with the sort of mindless (but stimulating) activities that I have used to fill all those big empty spaces where my life should be.

And I think that I have grown so ossified in my ways that it will take some sort of large emotional breakthrough to grind through all that rust on my bones and set me free.

Some things, despite my fondest wishes, cannot be done slowly and incrementally. Sometimes, it takes something puncturing your equilibrium and scrambling all the eggs in your little basket for you to finally be able to grow.

And growth is life. Lack of growth is death. We must grow to live. I believe that from hat to socks.

So hopefully, I will have some kind of emotional apotheosis soonishly and that will be, of course, bloody unpleasant but it will also open the doors for me to rearranged myself into a more content, calm, solid, fulfilled, and above all happy version of myself.

Happiness is definitely the target. That is the absolute top priority in life right now. Become happier. I have only recently pulled myself across the finish line of “thinking I deserve to be happy”, so I am not expecting spectacular results right away.

One recent realization that is helping with the happiness trail : I find dating/matchmaking sites depressing because all the guys on their are either shallow, skeezy guys looking for a “discreet” hookup, really fucking boring people.

I am telling you, I am getting so sick of profiles that start “I am just a normal guy… ” or “I am as regular a guy as they come… “[1]

I am SO ready for one that starts “I’m a freak of fucking nature… “.

I mean, why are these guys so eager to advertise how dull they are? It’s things like this that make me realize that I am actually pretty damned picky about the people with whom I associate and the odds of finding my Man of Life via some dating site are fairly low.

Because the thing is, I don’t really get along with normal people. Even when they are gay. I am a rare and exotic breed of weirdo, and I need the company of the same.

At the very least, I need another intellectual. And that goes way beyond intelligence. There are a lot of quite smart people who are nevertheless not intellectuals, and some people of fairly normal IQ who nevertheless make the grade because they have active, curious, deep minds.

That alone means I am choosing from like, 20 percent of the 10 percent, so already I am dealing with only 2 percent of the population right there.

Of course, there are alternatives to dating sites… like actually going out there and meeting people. In places outside this apartment. Places full of people I don’t know.

That sounds super freaking scary. But if I choose my venues properly, I should be able to cut down on just how uncomfortable I am.

So whenever I am ready for that step, I will look for the sort of thing that attracts intellectuals like myself, and go there. Should improve my odds and my anxiety levels.

Hmm, anything else to say about today… oh right. Picked up the magnetic clip-on sunglasses that were supposed to come free with my new glasses, but there was a mix-up and I only just got them today.

They are the right strength, and the magnetic part is kinda neat. But it adds weight to the glasses and makes me feel like they are always slipping down my nose.

Still, I have wanted something to fight glare for a long time, and these ought to do the trick.

And…. that’s about it!

Footnotes    (↵ returns to text)

  1. At least they have stop saying “straight-acting”… yeah pal, we will see how straight-acting you are when you are sucking my dick.