I think that part of the natural burden that comes with high IQ, especially when it is coupled with an expansive mind like mind, is that you see further and deeper than others. And don’t get me wrong, there can be huge advantages to that.

But when you are a utilitarian humanist like myself, you often feel like Cassandra, able to see the dangers coming but not being able to convince anyone of their reality. So you feel helpless against the tide of doom.

There is also a form of paranoia unique to the farsighted. It comes from that Cassandra feeling, and manifests as a feeling that you have to be looking for danger everywhere at all times because you’re stuck being the advanced scout for your herd and it is your your job to look down all possible paths to make sure the herd doesn’t end up blundering off a cliff or running directly into the jaws of a lion.

And sometimes, in moments of sadness or frustration, we might find ourselves envying the blinkered point of view of the average human being. They don’t see what you see. They don’t worry like you worry. They can just live their lives never looking at the path ahead, just getting through the day, assuming everything will be OK.

But you know, in your heart, that your mind could never fit into such a tiny space,. and that if everything does continue to be OK for the majority, it will be because of people like you clearing the path ahead.

As patient readers know, I have always seen and understood more than was probably good for me. I could tell when people were being insincere. I could see the difference between what they said and what they meant. I understood where people were coming from. I wasn’t consciously aware of this ability until I was in grade 4 or 5, but it was always there. And that alone robbed me of a certain kind of innocence.

It also made me more humanist as well because I could see how people struggle and how even unpleasant people had their reasons for being that way and how none of us get through life without heartache and pain.

Every person you have ever been jealous of is dealing with burdens you can never understand. Every person who seems to “have it all” is acutely aware of how much more to life there is than that. Every rich and powerful person is, like ourselves, an incomplete animal looking for love and connection and validation.

It’s a well-rounded perspective that gives me a very deep level of feeling for the humanity in all of us. To understand is to forgive, not because you are a bad person if you have hostile feelings towards anyone, but because when you look beneath the masks people wear, you always see another confused monkey trying to find the door into happiness just like you.

To me, that is the heart and soul of humanism – that looking beneath the surfaces we project and recognizing how fragile and vulnerable we all are.

This perspective on life often wins plaudits from people because it sounds so good, but when people try to apply it to their own lives,. they give it up pretty fast because  they are comfortable with their hatreds, resentments, and perceptions of others and to change that would be to change how they look at everything.

It’s a struggle. I have been wrestling with it my whole life, and I find it very hard sometimes. Part of me wishes I could be that blinkered member of the herd and act from emotion and stop trying to figure everything out all the time.

But there is no way to shrink a broadened mind short of brain trauma. You have outgrown your previous point of view, and trying to return to it is like trying to fit into the clothes you wore as a child.

It just plain won’t work.

It can be seen as a conflict between my humanitarianism and my humanity. The high holy ethics of true, deep humanitarianism must coexist with my being a stumbling naked monkey just like everyone else.

As attractive as the prospect might be, there is no way to leave your earthly self behind and move in with your higher ethics.

And some of the most dangerous people in the world are those who have convinced themselves that they have done so, because that makes them stop questioning themselves and holding themselves accountable.

Yup. Just like Donald Trump.

I have completely forgotten what I set out to talk about.

Oh right, the dangers of being a visionary.

The dangers can be dealt with. Developing a solid set of limits to how much responsibility you bear helps. I am working on that myself.

I’ve never been fond of barriers between me and others, but as it turns out, you need them in order to keep yourself together.

Forgiving yourself for being human is another big part of it. That’s much harder than recognizing the humanity you share with others. From a humanist point of view, the flaws and imperfections of others can be downright endearing.

But the judgements we lay upon ourselves are much harder to forgive because they become part of our identity, and changes in identity can seem like death to people.

Remember, whenever a butterfly is born, a caterpillar dies.

So we resist self-forgiveness instinctively. It’s too big a change for a lot of people, myself included. We can sense that to forgive oneself would change everything about how we view the world and ourselves, and because we are unable to imagine what that would be like, we view it as chaos and madness and horrible, and resist it.

How much healthier would we be if we all understand that it is impossible to stop being yourself? The real you… your core identity… is unchanging and immutable. New information can no more change who you really are than it can change you into a cheetah. You always have been and will always be yourself.

All that can happen is that you learn more about yourself. And while some of that is bound to be bad news and lead to the death of who you thought you were, the real you will still be there.

In fact, it will have grown.

I will talk to you nice people again tomorrow.