Got nothing on my mind right now. Feel a wee bit between thoughts.
So I will talk Second Life. [1]
I was reading a pretty interesting article about whether or not it would be better if offices replaced Zoom with some sort of 3D virtual meeting space with avatars[2] when the article mentioned the biggest and best example of this, Second Life.
It then diverted into a fascinating look at this one community and location called Virtual Ability Island, a community space for people with disabilities loosely organized around letting them do the things they could not do in the real world.
And that got me thinking about my own disabilities, like depression and obesity and especially my social anxiety, and I thought maybe Second Life could help me with that by being a small, doable step towards broader socialization.
It’s not exactly reality, but it’s a lot more “real” than the text-based environment that is my usual furry hangout, so it might make for an excellent place to desensitize.
So I decided to give it another try, After all, it had been at least a decade since I tried it the first time, so presumably it was a lot more refined by now.
When I tried it the first time it was crude. And ugly. And I just can’t hang around a palce that displeases me aesthetically.
What can I say, I’m a sensitive artist type.
Then again, maybe I just felt overwhelmed by novelty and social anxiety, freaked out, seized on one thing I didn’t like, and used that as my excuse to run away.
Whatever. Point is, it didn’t make me happy.
But that was a decade ago and I was curious about it again so I signed up, downloaded it, and gave it a shot.
It’s way better organized and cleaner looking now. The graphics are a lot better. Everything looks far more professional and far less ad hoc.
It’s all still kind of overwhelming to me, but I am easily overwhelmed.
Mental note : get more whelm.
I’ve given it two shots so far. Once, just to check shit out and look around. That ended with me in some place called Horizons where I was exhorted to play a really crappy kind of video game.
Like, would get a D as a beginner’s project in video game school.
Then I checked out a “Gaming” area, only to find it filled with strange casino games with various themes that all worked out to be basically bingo.
Yawn. Casino games are boring AF when there’s no real money on the line.
Then I checked out “Social Island” because it was so ridiculously on point with my goals that I could not resist.
And it was… chaotic, unsurprisingly. Random music playing in various places, random text conversations going on.
That’s when my social batteries wore out. Quit.
Then I looked up furry stuff for Second Life as I know there is a simply massive furry community there. Found out there was a huge adult GLBTQA+ club called GYC, so on my next sortie, I looked it up and checked it out.
Or rather, I tried to, but it turns out I was not “old” enough, in the sense that my character had been created too recently.
That hurt a bit, but I get it. They probably get a lot of assholes “griefing” them and that can only happen if people can make new characters and return to do more dickery, and having to wait three days between attempts would really take the fun out of it.
So it doesn’t matter if FurFagsDieLOL makes a whole new account. He still won’t be able to go get his trolling jollies for three days.
Being blocked was such a surprise, however, that I had no idea what to do next, so I ended up just quitting.
I will be giving it another shot later today.
I will keep you updated.
More after the break.
Life 2 Episode 3
Gave Second Life another shot.
Managed to hang around for a bit more than half an hour before getting too frustrated and/or bored and/or overwhelmed to continue.
Checked out Boystown, which is their big gay neighborhood. Wandered around a while, looking at this and that. Suddenly realized I had not seen any other players.
I went back to the “Destinations” tab and realized that some of the destinations had a number of players listed but Boystown did… not.
Yup. I was the only boy in Boystown,
How very depressing.
In fact, there’s nobody in most places. I am beginning to feel like the whole place is a boomtown after the boom. I may have arrived at the place when it’s circling the drain, socially speaking, and I am not going to find there to be a lot of “action”.
But then again, I once thought that about FurryMUCK and Tapestries, and it turned out that you just had to know where to go, so I will hold out hope for Second Life yet.
At least until I am “old” enough to go to the furry gay club.
If I don’t find my kind of action – conversation and/or gay furry sex – then I will give myself a pat on the back for expanding my boundaries and give up.
So far I found exactly one place where people were talking – an exhibitionist area called the Keyhole Bar (cute name). There were people dancing and the music was dance remixes of 80’s songs (how very) and people were, in fact, talking.
It was a pretty stupid conversation, but it’s a start.
I tried to join the conversation but nobody reacted to anything I said, and I got a shocking reminder of what it’s like to be socially invisible.
I am so well established on Tapestries that I forgot all about that feeling.
Not happy to have it back, to be honest.
But whatever. New people are always invisible. You have to hang around a place for a while before you become part of the scene and not just another blip on the screen, there for too short a time to be worth consideration.
Myself, I try to make sure to greet new people at Merriam’s, my hangout on Tapestries. But I am often too wrapped up in my interactions with my friends and acquaintances to even notice someone I don’t know.
So if I find a place I like, I will hang around till I decloak.
What the hell, I can always play a game in another window while I wait.
Oh, if anyone is curious, my username is DJKelvinZero.
Why Kelvin Zero?
Because I’m the coolest.
I will talk to you nice people again tomorrow.