It all started with this. Of course.
I heard it coming from Joe’s room and it reminded me of a time that I tried explaining to someone (possibly Felicity) what that line, “I am the maker of rules”, means.
And ended up not doing a great job because it turns out it’s really hard to explain.
And yet, the song is something I “get” on such a deep level that the first time I heard the song as a kid it immediately burned into my mind like a holy vision. Before I could say I even understood the lyrics consciously, I understood them on that deep and mysterious intuitive level that has always had a lot of power over my mind precisely because it’s so unlike my usual, logical mind.
Well I’m 40 years older than when I first heard the song and at least seventeen years more grown up, and so i am going to take a crack at that explanation.
So : what does the song (and me) mean when we say “I am the maker of rules”?
Because that’s a pretty mysterious statement.
The way I see it is this : most people just follow the rules without even understanding that they are doing it. To them, the rules ARE reality, even the fairly arbitrary social rules. This allows them to navigate the complexities of human reality with the deft surefootedness of a mountain goat, but also binds them to it.
Let’s call them The People.
Then there are those who fight the rules. The rebels, the troublemakers, the disturbers of shit. They perceive the rules intuitively but not clearly, and fight them without ever truly getting a clear picture of them or understanding their nature.
We’ll call them The Resistance.
Then there are those who understand rules and their nature and use that knowledge to manipulate the more ephemeral aspects of human reality to their own advantage and/or amusement. The sufficiently adept can do this so well that it can make them seem magical to The People and The Resistance.
But there is yet another level above them, and it the truly masters of reality who have the strength and vision to ask : but where did the rules come from?
How did they get there? Why are they what they are? How is it they can bind others? What gives them their power? And ultimate, HOW ARE THEY MADE?
Once you can answer these questions, you have ultimate power. You can change the very rules of reality, eliminating rules you dislike and making new ones that others will follow, fight, or use.
This is the power of the deep mystic who has transcended whatever mystic tradition they followed in other to pull back the veil and see reality for what it truly is.
It’s the power of the power behind the throne, the eminence grise whose machinations span generations and who wrote the very script for your life many years before you were even born.
It’s the power of the spiritual leader whose wisdom and understanding lets them bring people together under a vision so strong and compelling that it sweeps whole nations with it like a rushing tide.
And yes, it’s the power to read your mind and cheat you blind. For those who have this power, that’s a trivial challenge.
And most importantly, it’s the power that I yield. I have always seen through the rules and understood where they come from and how limited and often voluntary they are. And I have always felt free to ignore them and substitute my own when I see fit.
Now do you see why I obsess over my power sometimes?
That’s what happens when you were born a god.
Sometimes I wish I was a mere mortal.
But I suppose I should concentrate on being the best god I can be.
Take responsibility for my destiny.
But that’s scary and hard!
More after the break.
Fun new science word
The word is KUGELBLITZ.
It means “a black hole formed from radiation instead of matter”.
It’s entirely theoretical but it’s a fun thing to ponder and even more fun to say.
In fact, I want it to become new slang for something really big and amazing.
I’m telling you, that night the club was a total kugelblitz!
Like it’s the positive form of “clusterfuck”.
So uh… work on that, everybody!
Gay german pig voice : OK, yah, now I am Kugen, and zhis ist Blitzen, and ve’ere here to turn zhis party into a total…. epic…. KUGENBLITZ!
Along came a….
CONTENT WARNING : The following is rated NOT SAFE FOR ARACHNAPOBIA
So as I was getting ready to go out to do the shopping and hanging with my friends at Denny’s thang that is the highlight of my week, I grabbed a towel off the rack in my en suite and this HUGE black spider fell out and landed on the front of my shoulder.
And I went AAAAAAAAAAAAAAH! and the spider presumably also went
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAH! but in Spider and it fell off my shoulder and onto the ground where it scurried away under the vanity.
And I laughed. Because to me, that was hilarious. Such a perfect comedy beat, and my reaction was so spontaneous and real. I had to love it.
I treasure these moments in which I am perfectly human.
They are rare and precious to me.
And it felt good and right to laugh the tension away. That’s how I want to go through life, laughing at the bad stuff that’s trying to bring me down and using that laughter as life’s shock absorbed that let me bounce back no matter what.
To me, that’s the right way to live. And I feel like I have all the ingredients to live that way. I just need to build a good strong framework to install them into.
I will add that to the solid, substantial, emotional reasons to strive to get healthy.
Fuck nebulous things like long term health benefits and being “smart”.
Concentrate on the uncomplicated power of REWARDS.
Rewards like feeling better. Being able to do more. Feeling more comfortable in my healthier body. Feeling strong and durable instead of weak and frail.
And being horny as FUCK and actually able to DO something about it because now I have both the strong health body and the confidence to GO GET ME SOME.
Hell, even being able to eat the occasional naughty treat because my newly muscular body can use up all that excess blood sugar before it even becomes a problem.
That all sounds good for me.
Now I just have to fight the tide uphill to get over myself.
I’m working on it.
I will talk to you nice people again tomorrow.