Actually, it was kind of a stupid fall.
Lately, it seems like the most vulnerable moment in any trip with the walker is the very last one, when I finally get to sit or lie down again.
Case in point : what just happened.
I had roll-walked to the kitchen to grab my usual can of soda and piece of fruit to accompany my lunch.
I was just at the finale of my epic journey, the part wherein I triumphantly flop down into this here computer chair and set my ass to bloggin’.
But I missed the chair. Well, half-missed it, anyway. What happened was that I hit the chair at a weird angle and so instead of sitting down , my angular momentum was translated into both the chair and I falling over sideways.
I landed on the bed, thank Whoever. I swear, that grimy old bed of mine has saved me from grievous bodily harm at least a dozen times.
However, my water glass also went flying. splashing its contents all over my bed.
And the contents were, um…. not water.
OK, gross confession time : sometimes when I am lying in bed and my bladder is full and I really don’t feel up to getting up and going to the bathroom and my drinking glass happens to be empty, it becomes my temporary urinal.
Then, the next I AM going to the bathroom, I dump it out in the toilet, flush, rinse out the cup, and then it’s ready for its next tour of duty.
Back to our story : when I had my little fall, my “drinking plus” cup was in urinal mode and so it was my pee that got splashed onto my bed.
It’s like I wet the bed by proxy.
Luckily I don’t appear to be hurt and I am still determined to go to Denny’s tonight.
Damn the torpedoes and full steam ahead!
More after the break.
And now we return to the story already in progress
Well my god damned groceries were late.
They were supposed to arrive between 5 pm and 7 pm and they didn’t show up until almost 7:30 pm, just when we would normally be leaving for Denny’s.
So as you might imagine, the half hour leading up to 7 pm were filled with a rising tide of anxiety and agitation for this humble correspondent.
This is why I hate ever being late for anything : because I don’t want to put anyone else through what I went through today.
That delivery person should thank their lucky stars that I am both too ill and too Canadian to have gotten up and given them a piece of my mind.
Well, and I am also too kind-hearted and forgiving to do it.
I mean, I’m sure the guy is already having a bad day. It’s not like he wanted to be late but hey, excrement occurs, man.
So why make his day any worse?
I’m such a softie.
The good news is that I did successfully make it to Denny’s tonight, and had a lovely meal with even lovelier conversation with my friends.
So I feel especially well nourished right now, on more than one level.
I will talk to you nice people again tomorrow.