Well, time to flog more words from my brain.
Forgive me if I am not in the best of moods, but I still have that pain over my eye. I have a doctor’s phone call between 2 pm and 2:30 pm soon to talk about it.
I had to cancel my long overdue eye appointment for today because at around 10 am this morning, I woke up and the pain was pretty bad.
And then, in a moment of clarity, I suddenly realized that with my skull in this shape, the sorts of tests a full health eye exam involves would be excruciating.
So I called it off. Dammit. I need new glasses bad, but shit keeps happening.
It’s just as well, though, because it was only this morning that I got the “these are our covid protocols, YOU MUST READ THESE!” email from IRIS, and one of them was that I had to arrive an hour BEFORE my appointment, and that would have meant that I had to get there in like fifteen minutes, and that was never going to happen.
I was already having misgivings about the appointment anyhow because Julian has to dog-walk at 1:30 pm today and my appointment was at noon and there was some doubt as to whether he would be able to drive me home.
And at first. I was my usual agreeable self, saying that was no problem, that I could just take a cab home (a whole two blocks!), do what you got to do.
But this morning I realized that a) I have no cell phone for the calling of cabs and b) at that point, my eyes would be dilated as part of the eye exams, and that was probably a bad state to be in when looking for pay phones that might not even exist.
So next time. I will be more organized. I’ll make the appointment for earlier in the day and that way there can be someone to take me home when I am all dilated.
I am not keen on phone based doctor’s appointments. It puts too much pressure on my ability to describe my problem and that makes me nervous enough during in person office visits. I don’t need this kind of tension.
But this pain over my eyes is quite worrying. It’s in my right frontal sinus cavity (forget that crap I said about occipital sinuses, turns out there’s no such thing) and it’s a hard, solid pain that suggests the sinus is full of something, or severely inflamed.
Whatever. I just want it to go away so that i can return to my usual level of suffering.
I’, also getting a groceries delivery between 3 pm and 5 pm. It’s mostly meat, like hot dogs, bologna, and beef pot pies, but the first thing I added was a crazy amount of Anacid for my headaches.
I was originally going to buy a 200 pack for $20, but then I saw that they had 100 packs for $7 each, so that was an easy six bucks to save.
Now I really want to go back to sleep even though I already slept for seven hours.. Probably due to caffeine withdrawa – no Diet Coke left for me today.
But I can’t go to sleep because I have a doctor’s appointment and a food delivery coming up. So I am going to have to force myself tostay awake.
And I hate doing that/.
More after the break,
Into the Night
Daylight savings time is kicking my ass harder than usual this year.
Makes sense. This IS 2020, after all.
It gets dark so early now and my circadian rhythms are all out of whack. My body does nt not know whether I should be sleepy or not.
This happens every year, but it usually fixes itself in a day or two. But this year, I am still reeling and it’s been six days.
I am starting to see what those anti-DST people are on about. Because this sucks.
My body is even more stressed out than usual, and I really feel its confusion. Part of me wants to sleep for a year and part of me isn’t sleepy at all.
I think I need to think like a cat and start napping in sunlight somehow.
Make that little nest for myself out on our balcony that I keep talking about. Blankets, pillows, maybe a space heater for when it’s extra cold out.
Oh, and something to hang up to keep out the rain and wind. An old shower curtain, maybe, or a tarp.
Tarp is a silly word.
Could be pretty cozy, and a good place to get fresh air and sunshine and an escape from this here computer of mine.
It is my loved/loathed interdependent mind alter, after all.
Ironically, I am even sleepier now than I was earlier. I got my nap after the groceries came, and yet here I am again.
Either my body chemicals are completely confused, or I have accrued one whopper of a sleep debt and today it came due.
I can’t go to sleep now anyhow. I have this blogging to do, plus I got 7-11 on the way.
So glad I can order from there again, although the menu seems to have changed. The crinkly fries and samosas are missing and for some strange reason I can order Diet Pepsi or Coke Zero but not Diet Coke.
Weird. I should check to see which 7-11 I am ordering from. It might not be the ne just a couple of blocks from here.\
They always have samosas. And Diet Coke.
So today’s been kind of a drag for me. So much time spent resisting sleep, which I hate doing because it stresses me out and puts me in that “tried and wired” state of mind I hate so much, where I am too tired to do anything but also too tired to sleep.
Oh well, Once I have eaten, I can sleep, and know peace once more.
I will talk to you nice people again tomorrow.