Gods, am I sick of things not fucking working.

As previously mentioned, I bought a game called Wolfenstein 2 : The New Colossus.

And the motherfucking thing does not work. I get through the displaying of various people’s logos (studio, distributor, publisher, lead programmer’s dog’s chess club) and then the thing freezes and cannot be thawed.

Tried a bunch of things the Internet suggested. None of it worked. So that game lies moribund on my Steam account awaiting something – like divine intervention – to happen to let me play the fucking thing.

And I was really looking forward to it, too. The game got amazing reviews from both critics and players alike, and sounded like something I would enjoy.

But nope. Denied. I would have returned it, but I bought it through Fanatical and they make it a pain to return things, and it was only $15, so for now, they win.

Then I bought Borderlands 3. And I was super stoked for it. I own and have played all the way through all the previous games in the series and am a super big fan of them. They have this crazy play style and snarky sense of humour that I can’t resist.

Not that I’d want to.

But the same thing happened. Le jeu ne jouera pas. The fucking thing won’t play. It also freezes immediately after playing the logos, and that’s just plain not fucking fair.

I’m going to have to return it. It’s only stubborn rage that has kept me from doing it already. As if somehow, I am still going to FORCE it to do what I want.

And after the fucking thing took forever to download because it’s 85 gigs! I haven’t had a download take that long since the days of the BBS, for fuck’s sake.

Oh, and the real kicker? I’d been through all this before. Of course, I only remembered that once I had been through it all again.

I’d bought the game, made it through the epic download, tried to play it, and tried to make it work once before, and ended up returning it.

At least this time, I paid 2/3 less for it.

Update : it took some finagling, but i just verified that it’s not a matter of my computer not meeting the system requirements for the game. So I can cross that out as a cause. My computer can handle it just fine.

Ditto for Wolfenstein 2. Flying colors.

So something seriously fuckywonky (TM) is going on here. I should be able to play both games without any problems, and yet, problems.

Problems galore, to be honest.

The fault has to lie with the programmers. Something they did is fundamentally incompatible with my computer despite it being a very modest and “normal” PC.

So they fucked up, and as a result, I am denied two awesome games.

Now I have to find something else I might like.

And if that one fails, well, someone’s just gonna have to die.

It’s the only solution.

More after the break.

My limited brutality

I’ve been telling myself for a few months now that within certain narrowly defined limits, I am absolutely without mercy – an intellectual brute.

And that’s true as far as it goes. But now the undefined nature of those narrowly defined limits has started to really bother me.{{!}}

So let’s start with the basic definition I have been working from for a while : I never attack people personally but I have no hesitation or mercy when it comes to their publicly stated opinions.

I will destroy opinions I consider evil and wrong with my ninja dragon level mental martial arts and my hydrogen bombs of logic and reason, and if that happens to hurt the person holding that opinion at the time, I am totally fine with that.

They should have thought about that before they became scum.

But I know it’s not that simple. I know that, for example, that a casual observer seeing me bringing that level of force to a mere public debate could easily decide that I am some kind of raging monster with no sense of proportion or restraint, like some kind of intellectual Juggernaut (nope, not saying it)/

And they are not wrong. I have some serious goddamned issues and the fact that I would only let that psycho monster in my head off the chain when I feel it is “justified” can only, at best, partially compensate for that.

And I worry about that monster in my head sometimes. I know he’s just waiting for the moment he is unleashed so he can fuck things up with a two by four.

And that will probably not be good, Sure, it’s quite easy (and fun) to imagine unlikely action movie situations involving packs of ninjas, or other conveniently morally unambiguous situations where it’s clear who is right and who is wrong and who seriously needs a brutal lesson in the benefits of civilization.

(while kicking bad guy butt) “Is this the way you like it, motherfuckers? Survival of the fittest? Well guess what asshole, in that scenario, YOU LOSE! Now don’t you wish you had the protection of a just and fair civilization right about now? Well? DON’T YOU?”

Then, afterwards, to my now horrified friends : “The ultimate duty of a gentleman is to maintain and enforce the standards of civilized behaviour. Ironically, this on occasion requires unleashing the beast within so that one might demonstrate to the primitives that anarchy does not necessarily favour them. “

That would be a damned good set piece. Especially if, until that point, I had been an extremely civilized, gentlemanly fellow with Old World manners and the air of the stuffy, effect intellectual about me.

Hence my joke, “My hobby is beating the shit out of Social Darwinists. I mean, what are they going to do, plead for me to be fair? To follow the rules? To have mercy on them because they are weaker than me? I don’t think so.

I take their stuff too! It’s fun. “

To me, that’s hilarious, but then again, I know I am joking.

More or less. Mostly. More times than not.

I will talk to you nice people again tomorrow.

[[1]]I don’t like that kind of ambiguity. When I am ambiguous, I do so in a rigidly defined way[[1]]

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